The Life Tales of Edwina

I was scared. I really scared. I've thought nobody was scared of losing me anymore. Even you. I'm such a messed with all of my own thoughts, all of my negative thoughts that destroy me in the end. I'm too early judge and conclude about all the thing that you've done to me. I literally didn't mean to hurt you. I just wanna see, I'm craving for a prove that there's someone who's scared to lose me, I just wanna being the one you need. I'm on that lvl of insecure before. I'm so sorry. I can't watching you suffering alone from a pain again it's hurt me too. Please do believe me. You're the only one that I want I'm sure. I'm really sorry. I'm beyond speechless for telling me what I feel. You will have no idea how much I love you.

I'm such a trash. I hate me too.

Mungkin dikultuskan dalam perjamuan bulir darahku, namamu seorang. Hingga mengingkarimu adalah hal yang mustahil.. Ini adalah penggalan lirik lagu milik mas Sal Priadi. Masih, tentang tulisan satu objek yang sama. Entah harus dimulai darimana tulisan ini, mencintai seseorang memang menyerap kekuatanmu. Mengubah seolah-olah orang yang kamu cintai adalah satu-satunya sumber tenaga yang bisa membuatmu berenergi dan sebaliknya. People who can love deeply are horrifying. I dont have any words anymore.

I've never been so deeply in love my whole life. Loving someone so much before, this feeling kinda just exploded from hidden place that I never knew. I dont know why this could be so hurts, till I physically feel it. Craving for someone until you're litteraly ache. But I feels like this is worth the universe, we can face it, I can. As I remember, never been so in love with someone as much as I love him before, feels like I can give him my world instead. And suddenly, I dont have eyes for somebody else, never. My journey just stop here, I couldn't ask for more, I want only him. Semua tipe-tipe kriteria pasangan just gone until I met him, this is just insane. Aku tidak ingin menuntut banyak, selain berusaha menjadi rumah untuknya, I never done this big improvement before, I try so hard for being a better me for him. Being a home, means I can handling all of his gloomy, bad feeling, sadness, even his anger through his ups and downs. Really wanna see him being a better person f